Friday, January 7, 2011

I swear to god, if I don't die from the flu. (Or, The Benefits of the Influenza Virus on the Male Figure)

If I don't die from the flu before I procreate, my spawn are gonna be immune to damn near everything. And it will all be thanks to me, good old dad. Seriously, I've had this damn flu for like a week, I spent two days with a fever, then three and a half days where my throat hurt so much that I couldn't do anything even the least bit physically demanding without going into a disgusting coughing fit that generally resulted in me expelling a bunch of super gross green shit from my lungs all over anything nearby. Then my damn ears started to get plugged up with some damn weird stuff. The first time it hurt really bad and it made me super angry, but it went away after a few hours. Then the next day it started earlier in the day and lasted longer and it just barely went away by the time my friends came over to watch The Deer Hunter. Then it happened and hasn't gone away since. It doesn't hurt anymore, I think because my eardrum is probably stretching and expanding to make room for more fluid or whatever the hell is in there making it so I can't really hear shit.

This sucks. I hate life right now.

Also haven't eaten in like three days because I haven't had any appetite. Three whole days and I've put nothing into my body but water, tea, and Coke. I feel like I should eat because it might help me get better faster, but I really just don't feel like eating anything. Silver lining, though, it made me lose a few pounds and I look fucking goooood.

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